My website (photo card chef one) has recently undergone a huge visual change – colors, style, and overall feel of the website are totally different than they were a month ago.  I actually am pretty proud of the way things look on my website now.  Both the homepage and the shop look like one website, even though they’re two separate entities.  The colors seem professional.  The invitations are becoming better as I go along, and I have had lots of great feedback concerning the website, not just from friends, but from other photographers I’ve been partnering with.  So when I got an e-mail about how bad my website was, and how cluttery and un-professional my invitations were from another photographer today, I reacted a number of different ways: defensive of course, upset, hurt, confused, and curious – maybe he was right!   At first glance (when i could tell by his first line that this was not going to be a nice e-mail), I stopped reading and decided right then to take it all as positive criticism.  I wasn’t going to let my pride get in the way of some possibly helpful advice. I reviewed his comments and compared them against my website (all the time trying not to think bad thoughts about him and make up bad jokes about his lowly home state of Nebraska).  I didn’t see what he was talking about completely, and as I got more and more upset by it all, decided to drop it.  Forget it.  He never wrote that e-mail.

This experience made me think about criticism in general.  Why is it so easy to dish it out?  …Either to people’s faces or behind their backs?  It’s so easy to give out, and yet can be so hurtful.  I literally had to go back and re-read alllll of the e-mails saying how much people like my website to help counteract this one comment.  What does it do when I criticise my child?  Do I have enough positive to counteract the negative?  This guy was even trying to be nice about it – he wasn’t bashing – just saying what needed work! He didn’t have anything positive to say about anything, i guess, but still – he wasn’t horrible about his presentation.

Now to figure out what is criticism in hiding: what do I tell Aria that hurts her more than helps her?

I dunno – it’s been an interesting experience i guess.  I haven’t been one to get much criticism my entire life – I’ve always been one of the best at what I do (music) (though it’s definitely not that way now – good thing i just stay at home now).  I can see why it can be so damaging for people – especially kids.  Good lesson today.